Tiny, Dark Crevices

Hi everyone,

The other day I was reading a book about relationships, and in it the author quoted another author who had written that people unconsciously choose romantic partners who have a better immune system than they. Though the author of the book I was reading eventually refuted this statement later on, once I read that quote, I looked up from my book, laughed, and looked at the wall. Flabbergasted, I spent a few moments digesting what I had just read.

And then my laughter turned into tears.

Because the reality is that my immune system isn't so great, therefore, according to the author, I am virtually undesirable.

Is this true? Hell no. Because I have hope in the God who redeems, who heals, who doesn't let illness overcome His children.

Yet messages like these are ever so common. I know so because I have worked to refute such messages for a long time now, even before I got Lyme. Like the Lyme bugs hanging out in all corners of my body, these negative messages are sneaky: they work themselves into the tiny, dark crevices of my heart, my mind, my being. I usually don't even realize these negative messages exist until I read statements like above, or someone says something unknowingly hurtful, or when I'm told (explicitly or implicitly) to shut my mouth about the suffering I have experienced.

At this point, I like to remind myself of 1 John 1:5, "This the message we have heard from him and announce to you, that God is Light, and in Him there is no darkness at all." This is the message I want to hear everyday. Likewise, this is the message that I want to break into those tiny, dark crevices.

Towards freedom,

A.